call me friendgirl

Gosh.
Hanging out with *ean today before I leave for Montreal. We run into his dad at Quizno's. So he introduces me. As Dunja. His dad has a firm handshake. Says I should come over for dinner sometime or something.
It was severely weird. For me. They seemed fine. I was weird. Feeling.

Then, later, he calls me his GIRLfriend. I'm not his girlfriend! We've had this talk like... 5 times! Just yesterday, Aliyana goes, "Is this your boyfriend?" when I'm introducing him and I manage to avoid the awkwardness (or make it ten times worse, either/or) by completely pretending I didn't hear her and being all like "*ean, Aliyana. Aliyana, *ean." Then he brought the 'boyfriend' thing up later. He couldn't just let it go and be awkward by itself in the corner. No. He has to be all like, he could be my boyfriend... if I wanted that. And we had the talk. Again. #5.
So today he calls me his GIRLFRIEND. Is he DENSE? No GIRLFRIEND! Why girlfriend? Why? 5 TALKS *EAN!!!

He has an IQ of 140, but can't remember I'm not his girlfriend and that he's not supposed to have feelings for me. Gah. That's the definition of frustration. And density. Apparently.

Everyone is late coming over to my house for this Montreal Ribfest Kickoff thing. They all suck.
It'd better be a good trip. *ean better come to his senses before I get back or there will be trouble. (I predict tears. Hopefully not mine.)

Feelings

*ean says he thinks he 'might have feelings' for me.

Why?

shake it 'til you're shaking the floor

Ashley is joining us for MONTREAL: 2005
Which means it is going to be obscene.
OBSCENE.
We're going to make an insane number of 'friends'.
We're going to drink insane amounts of alcohol.
We're going to engage in insane dancing for hours upon hours (as clubs don't close in Montreal until 3-4am... I'm telling you, those Frenchies know how to party...)
And we're probably going to go hungry for an insane period of time (I'd guesstimate 3 days).
Bonus: We're all going to do it together.
If this isn't a team-building experience, I don't know what is.

I went to the Pride Parade today. Sweltering heat, gyrating bodies, one Martini Man on a Martini float... *drools*. Too bad he's gay. Nelly was right...

Exam in less than two days. 6 chapters to read. So screwed.

Wednesday, 5p.m. Summer officially begins. Plans out the wazoo. If even half of them actually pan out, I might just have the best summer of my life on my hands. That's an exciting prospect.

The weather has been fan-tabulous. 32*C week ahead of us. Which will suck when I have work Tuesday, but it's rocking the other days.

FRIday out with Alex - wasn't half bad. Met some Irish lads, played some frisbee, found some stuff out about Alex, people watched at the mall and got to see Alex's retard impression, ate too much, laughed too much, and visited a candy store. Actually, when I put it that way, the day rocked. Nelly helped. She gave me a kick-start with an amazing lunch at her place. Two thumbs up on the turkey sandwich.

*ean and I hit up a Sushi place yesterday and enjoyed being tailed by (seemingly) homeless people everywhere we went last night. Also, witnessed a standoff between some police officers and *ean's 'dad'. Today, after the parade, we grabbed some ice cream and chilled out in the quad. I would've hit up the frosh leader thingy - but I didn't have a ride and it was too far away. So pish posh.
Weirdly enough, Tristan tells me, "Wellman says hi" when I call to tell him I'm not coming. Seems odd. Seeing as how we haven't SPOKEN in like A YEAR. *shrug-a-rug*

"Are you kididding me?"
"What?"
"Are you KIDIDDING me?"
"Is that even a word?"
"What, 'me'?"
...

summer's here

42*C with the humidex.
Glad I don't have work today.
Glad I have friends with air-conditioning in their homes.
Glad I live in Toronto, where every public place is air-conditioned.

I think we're all spoiled.
Cheers!

i hope you don't have trust issues...

Why, oh why am I such a wonderful person?
My boss roused me from my dreams of not being roused at 10AM to tell me the girl that does the morning shift is sick and can't make it in and will I please come in for the full day?
So I said yes.
Then at work, my boss said would I please bag the two jackets separately because this lady is really anal and doesn't want them bagged together? So I said yes. Then she came in and asked why we were wasting plastic and did we know about the size of the holes in the ozone layer?
Later, at the mall with my mom, I saw the girl who's shift I'd covered walking around, eating an ice cream cone. I was too embarrassed for her to say anything, so I pretended like I didn't notice anything out of the ordinary when she looked at me kinda wide-eyed-deer-caught-in-headlights type thing.
Then I got home and 'finished' my essay, but really all that means is that I have six pages written now. I still have to make it make sense and sound nice and be on topic and whatnot.
The trouble is that I've never been less motivated to do anything in my life. And I know I make sweeping general statements like that all the time and they rarely reflect reality (ooh, alliteration!), but this time it's actually really accurate.
You'll have to take my word on it. I hope you don't have trust issues.

Montreal, QC

So, if all goes as planned (i.e. Nelly is as flexible and willing to go along with anything ridiculous I come up with as ever), I will be in glorious Montreal this Canada Day weekend.
It's not an elaborate plan. I'm not running away from home or drugging my parents or taking my sister hostage or anything like that. I'm just going to Greyhound it down because it'll put my dad at ease and that's the only way he'll let me go.
'Cept I can't do it on my own.
Which is where Nelly comes in.

In other news,
1) *ean was freaking me out today with his talk of "eventually", because I thought we'd established that "eventually" didn't exist for us. We had another sit-down. And decided a whole bunch of stuff, the main bit of which was something about us not talking about stuff anymore - important stuff anyway. It's just depressing. He smells really good though.
2) I finally splurged and bought that UofT sweater I've wanted since last winter (50% off), that Dolce & Gabbana "Light Blue" perfume I've wanted since February, and a pretty silver ring I've been in love with for several weeks. I will regret it when I have no money to buy food in Montreal, I know, but at least I'll smell good.
3) My essay that was due today at 5pm still isn't written. At this point, I'm aiming to have it done for Wednesday. If I keep going at the current rate, it'll be done approximately never.
4) Never is also, coincidentally I'm sure, the next time I'm taking a summer course.

oh, the summer nights

Going to baba's and deda's... is such a freaking chore
Going to baba's and deda's... is nothing but a bore
My younger cousin is a freaking decade younger than me
There's absolutely nothing interesting there for me to see
I haaaate going to baba's and deda's, it's a waste of time
I'd rather stay home and write my essay and that's a horrible sign
OOoh, going to baba's and deda's... is such a freaking CHORE
It's so boring, so boring, so boring, it's such a freaking BORE!!!!

But my dad makes me do it because he keeps saying that they're old (not really) and gonna die soon (probably not) and then I'll be sorry I didn't visit them more often (unlikely because I visit them once a week, and that's plenty by anyone's standards).

Can you say "Guilt Trip"? Works every time.

I hope I can write an A+ essay in a few hours because ONCE AGAIN, I've managed to leave things 'til the last minute even though we got a five day extension. PROCRASTINATOOOOOR, you evil, evil horrendous monster who invades every freaking aspect of my life - even the brain space allocated to *ean, because I STILL haven't decided if I should just dump him really gloriously by throwing a colourful drink in his face next time we go out and yelling, "Stop calling me fat!" or if I should just keep him around because he's good at what he does... sigh - you're going down! (Procrastinator!)

Inner struggle supreme:
Chase something that isn't going anywhere because I love the chase?
OR
Stop chasing something that isn't going anywhere and look for something I can catch?

MAAAAYBE,
I can chase something that isn't going anywhere because I love the chase WHILE keeping my eyes open for something else I can actually catch at the same time - however, I'm afraid if I don't focus all my energy on one endeavour at a time, that I'll get distracted and either end up catching the thing I never wanted to catch (by accident) or miss seeing something I would've seen had I not been so busy chasing something useless. See? I know, it's complicated. I'm not even sure it makes sense to me.

I hope my parents (read: dad) give me their (read: his) blessings to go to Montreal because I'd really like to have their (his) blessings and not have to kill them (him) and then run away (not actually) to Montreal, and I would do all of the above (kill, run away) if I don't get their (his) blessings because at this point I would feel horrendously gay (in the least homosexual sense) if I didn't go since
1) it was all my idea (the Canada Day Montreal trip) in the first place, and all of my bestest pals are going (Nelly, Zeebs, Pauly)
2) staying home would be the shit since all my bestest pals would be gone
3) I'd be forced to be with my parents (on account of number 2) doing the same thing I've been doing EVERY Canada day for as long as I can remember (i.e. not much at all)
and 4) there's something abbhorently unappealing about sitting in my basement eating ice cream (refer to number 3 for explanation of why I would be doing this) when I know everyone I know (three people, apparently) are in Montreal having a kickass (drunken) time.

I don't really understand the logic behind the fossils not giving me their blessings to go in any case because
1) I'm 20 years old (it's time to let go)
2) it's only like 450km
3) it's only like 3 days
4) it's my money
5) it's my liver
and 6) they're officially letting me go to Cuba for a week this winter with one person, and Cuba is arguably a less politically stable environment (and thus potentially more dangerous) then Quebec...
Maybe they have some weird ideas about the French separatists, I mean, I could understand mounting concerns seeing as how it's Canada Day and Quebec... well, we all know the deal with Quebec - potential hostage situations and whatnot (although I'd make a useless hostage) but I don't think that's where their concern lies. I think they're more concerned with Zeebs' driving, although they've never seen her drive, (if they had, they'd never let me get into a car with her again, period), and so, I don't get it. At all.
Concern over Castro < Concern over some Frenchies?

Maybe they disapprove of the European atmosphere in Montreal. They're afraid I'll turn all artsy on them and get impregnated by some mime or something. But that doesn't make sense either because we're FROM Europe, and I've been to the ACTUAL Europe and never gotten pregnant...

Maybe they're afraid I won't come back (which is the most likely scenario), but I don't know why they'd be afraid of that since
1) they don't seem to like me too much as it is
2) it would save them at least $10,000 a year in tuition and book expenses, not to mention what I eat and drink in this place
3) they could make money off of me being gone by renting out my room to... some loser who wants to live in the suburbs? Ok, scrap 3...
4) they're always complaining about me diagnosing them and analyzing them and playing my music too loud - and this would eliminate all of that
plus 5) my mother could lie to all of her friends and tell them I'd run away with a boy and no longer have to live with the shame of having a perpetually single daughter

I think my parents just like being arbitrary with me. They like reminding me that most things don't make sense, that most things won't make sense, and that I should stop trying to make sense of things. Maybe that's their 'life gift' to me. If I can get that through my thick skull, I have a feeling things will seem less frustrating if not more understandable.

In the Shadow of Leaves

I used to wonder about loss and meaning. Then, looking back on my youth, I remembered an oft-repeated phrase: "you don't know what you have until it's gone". So, I gave up everything in order to see what I had. It turned out that I had nothing; mostly because I had given it all away. I guess they were right after all.

-Chestocrates

Check him out here.

PostSecret is an ongoing community art project where people mail-in their secrets anonymously on one side of a homemade postcard.

For more PostSecrets, click here.

Slight Glitch

Since you all seem to object so much to my 'doomsday' predictions, we shall call this mishap (which I predicted) a 'slight glitch' (even though it is of doomsday proportions).
So, *ean, who's wonderful in every other way, is completely
1) Not over his ex-girlfriend and
2) Not ready for a committed relationship of any kind
the second of which is kinda fine, because I don't think I'm ready for a committed relationship of any kind myself, but the first one is screwy because a) well, for obvious reasons, and b) in the odd event that I become ready for a serious relationship at any point in the future - the first one will still be messing me up, and messing him up - he will be completely emotionally unavailable as a result, and I'll get hurt. Ta dah.
Now, before you go all haywire thinking this is just some stupid thing I've come up with in my head or something because I'm just looking for something to go wrong - he pretty much confirmed both of those assumptions made by me
a) verbally implicitly (he keeps bringing up his ex, so although he hasn't come right out and said 'I'm not over my ex', this is clearly the case - or, if he is over her (which I wouldn't give him the benefit of the doubt about, but let's say he is for the sake of argument) then he's definitely not over the relationship/situation, so that's just as bad).
b) and he confirmed the 2nd one verbally explicitly. (He said, and I quote, "I'm not ready for a serious relationship of any kind".)
So there you have it.

Where does that leave us?
Well, I think it leaves me feeling frustrated, which seems to be a general trend. But not as frustrated as I've been in the past, because I saw this one coming like a mack truck. And I think it leaves me (for the most part) single because we pretty much decided we were just going to 'date' and not even hope or work towards anything deeper or more meaningful. Which is actually quite okay because it is summer and I am who I am. And then there was some wishful thinking on his part about when I come back from vacation and whatnot because I'm pretty 'awesome' (as if I didn't know that already), but I think I'll have come to my senses by then and this will be such old news that he doesn't really stand a chance. But I didn't tell him that. I just kinda nodded blankly.

Yes, it is kinda odd we ended up having this discussion on our third date - but things have been moving kinda fast in general (I don't mean in the slutty way, I mean in terms of comfort level and clicking and inside jokes and whatnot) so it kinda makes sense that this would come up pretty fast too. Although it's still weird. But better now then 3 weeks into it when I'm really into him, right?

The only actually good news that comes out of all of this is that Zeebs was totally and unequivocally, irrevocably wrong about him being about one thing. So haha to her.

But don't tell her I said that. She scares me.

Anyway, I didn't ask, but I'm pretty positive it's okay for me to see other guys - so maybe I should give Red Lobster dude a call back?
Haha. I can't even keep a straight face about it. Not likely.
But I'll definitely be talking to that cutie from class...

Red Lobster guy called.
5 days too late.
Like 2 months since I gave him my number.
Nerd.

My friend cut his finger. Deep.

The end.

My life, just watch:

La La La Peachy Peachy Peachy La La La Peachy Peachy Pe-BAM. Brick Wall.

Just wait for it.
You'll see.
(Since everything is so peachy, I have nothing to bitch about, and thus, this thing is completely obsolete. Until I hit the wall. Which I will. Soon. Just watch...)

your own squishy

Adam: "I found out you do play hockey."
Me: "What?"
Adam: "Tonsil hockey! BRAAP BRAAP!"

(Note: It took him 3 days to come up with this.)

I will never live this down.
I would just like to point out, (although I shouldn't have to,) that I'm twenty, that I haven't been on a 'date' since February, and that kissing happens. Okay? I shouldn't have to justify anything. It's not like I did anything wrong. You all suck.

ANYWAYS:
- The Countdown is on: tomorrow it'll be exactly a month before I leave for Serbia and Montenegro. I must say, the excitement hasn't hit me yet. I'm not looking forward to the flight over. Or the 45-degree weather. Or that small apartment. Or saying bye to friends here only to have to say bye to friends there a little later. That's the bit I'm never going to get used to - it's so sucky never (and I mean NEVER) having everyone you care about in the same place at once. It's such a small, seemingly inconsequential thing - but it severely messes you up.
- Work was hell.
- Aerobics was a continuation of the hell-experience.
- I lost some more weight. I think I'm down 8 pounds since... well, since I started actually keeping track of how much I weigh. And it shows. Because these little sticky-out bits (some people call them 'love handles', don't know why) that used to stick out when I wore jeans don't exist anymore. I just noticed that today.
- Zeebs is putting on the pressure for Canada Day. She totally wants to hit up Montreal for the weekend, and it was kinda my idea, but my dad is so completely not feeling it. She totally doesn't get that though. She thinks I can just up and leave. Which I should technically be able to do, since I'm OLD... but I depend on this dude for my livelihood. He pays for school, food, shelter... I mean, this is someone you do not want to piss off by any means.
- My mom noticed my neck today. So it's official: my entire family knows now. She said, "I can't believe you didn't tell me you had a boyfriend." I said, "I don't." She goes, "Even worse."
Yes. I realize.
WHY IS EVERYONE ACTING LIKE I'M HAVING SOMEBODY'S ILLEGITIMATE CHILD? Good lord. BACK OFF.



GET YOUR OWN SANDWICH!

Quick Fix

These two girls (6 and 4 I'd estimate) come into the store with their mom, and I give them some lollipops as is customary. They ask me what grade I'm in and what my favourite colour is, I reciprocate as we wait for their mom's debit thingy to go through. Then, as they're leaving, the older one says, "Bye beautiful girl!". The younger one echoes the older one.
So cute.

Midterm test worth 37.5%
Class average = 65.
Second highest mark = 84.
My mark = 92.
BRAAP BRAAP!

Micheal Jackson is innocent, suckers.

Aaaaaaand, grand finale - *ean's FUN!

I have this feeling of horrendous impeding doom. Like I'm going down a hill really fast in my rollerblades and the wind whipping the skin on my face feels awesome in the heat, and there are all sorts of pebbles on the ground and I'm missing every single one, and I'm just going faster and faster and there's this amazing exhilirating component to it, but there's also this fear telling me to step on the brakes because a giant car is about to roll around the corner. And I'ma crash. And burn. And it'll suck.
That's how I feel. Like something unbelievably shitty has to happen to offset everything amazing. Because this weekend was amazing. And today was amazing.

Oh, and my dad noticed my neck... But I don't think that was the horrendous thing that's going to happen. It'd take much more than that to balance things out.

HICKeys

AAAAAAAAH!
What a crazy night.
Things worth noting:
1) "Suburbanites are better then the hicks that want to be ghetto though." - Adam
"What do they do? Yell 'Braa Braa' with their pitchforks in hand?" - Alex
2) Adam and Brent dancing.
3) Palav was wearing awesome shoes.
4) Everyone that said they were coming out showed up except for Tristan because he sucks (he gave me some excuse about free booze, but I don't buy it for a second.)
5) The guy with the shirt over his head at the bar.
6) Pat. He was awesome.
7) Ashley introducing me to *ean.
8) Irena rescuing me from the clutches of the British dude.
9) Zeebs rescuing me from the clutches of the British dude.
10) Ashley rescuing me from the clutches of the British dude. (He was persistent.)
11) I will forever be mocked about the end of the night. Forever. It is something I'm willing to deal with though.
12) Ran into people I knew there that I hadn't even invited. (Noteably: Phil)
13) Zeebs is such a fucking trooper. I owe her BIG TIME.

Thank you one and all.

Schumy Reference #2

It's official - the foxy guy works out every Wednesday and Thursday (and possibly more days, but definitely those two) from approximately 6 p.m.-8 p.m. Which means that I keep running into him. At the water fountain. Accidently of course.
I haven't had a stupid girly crush in a long time. So this might be good for me.

Today was a slow, lazy day. I spent a good hour just lounging in bed. It was too goddamned hot to do anything else, and although I should've been in the backyard working on my tan - uh, it was too hot?

I'm not very inspired to write about anything, but I feel this inexplicable urge to do so. So this will possibly be just one of those streams of consciousness thingies that don't make any sense to anyone and aren't entertaining at all to read. But sometimes you have to do stupid things before you can get to the good stuff. That's life.

So the instructor lady made us get into that 'aligned-body' pose today and hold it for a full minute. It's basically getting into push-up mode, except you're not pushing up - you're just holding yourself up on your toes with your arms, obviously, and just - well, try doing it for a minute (butt down). It's STUPIDLY excruciating. But, (there is a point), when I went to my very first aerobics class, I did it for 20 seconds barely and then collapsed. Today I held it for the full minute - almost no problems. That's good I suppose. That's progress.
My sister spent a good five minutes pushing me around on her skateboard in the upstairs hallway this afternoon. I'm not really sure how we came up with that idea. I was in her room, and she said "What are you doing?" and I said "Skating." But that was a lie because I was really only just standing on her skateboard not really doing anything, and so she came in there and started pushing me around. Weird.
I was watching the MTV Movie Awards, and was just about to get to the best part (Katie Holmes presenting to Tom Cruise - can you say 'Publicity Stunt?') when my dad came downstairs to watch the final credits of Fraiser. WTF? He thinks he owns this place. (Which he technically does, with my mom, so I guess I need to move out if I wanna watch my shows on my time. Or maybe I should suggest "Personal TV" to my dad... Man, I'm a marketer's dream...)

I have work tomorrow, so if anyone owns a gun - this would be... and you all know the rest...

D Pt. II

Today, I slept in.
Got a visit from Nelly at work. She came bearing gifts, looking very cute in her turqoise shirt and pink skirt.
We have a sign at work. It states:
"Dear Customers,
As a courtesy,
Please undo all shirt buttons.
Thank you."
It's meant to discourage people from leaving their shirts with us all buttoned up because then I have to undo them, and that takes SO MUCH time (not to mention how it wrecks my nerves...)
Anyways, this guy came in today and started undoing his shirt. I was like "WTF?" And he's like, "So, what exactly is the point of this?" At this point, I'm like "WTF?!?!" And he's like "I'm doing what the sign says, but I really don't see why I should. What are you looking for a free peep show?"
Weirdo.
I got home and my sister told me to go look at what was on my bed.
It was a gorgeous bouquet of blue roses. Gorgeous.
I was excited to see who they were from and hurried to open the card.
On one side: "Be careful. Roses dyed. Colour stains." On the other side: "Happy Birthday D!"
That's it.
No name, no reply address... nothing.
Well, the flowers are beautiful. And I definitely feel super special and awesome and wonderful, but I'd like to know who they're from. To say thank you. For an amazing and thoughtful (and expensive) gift.
Pauly and Zeebs came over, also bearing gifts. We ate some cake and drank some cranberry juice. Zeebs regailed us with tales of her childhood. Nails and trees and whatnot...
Then we hit Wendy's for some dinner.
Awesome day.
The phone was ringing off the hook with people being absolutely wonderful and taking time out of their busy schedules to wish me a happy one.
Thanks everyone.
You rule.

I found it!
The IDEAL procrastination tool!
Been searched for by millions, uncovered only by me. :) I rule.

Random Speak

Maybe I'm Wrong

Pauly called today and in classic Pauly fashion told me that he wouldn't be making the dinner portion of my birthday celebration because "he has other stuff to take care of."
It didn't catch me by surprise at all, which is good in some ways and bad in others. It's good that I'm finally letting go of my expectations of people in general, because I find that lots of anxiety ensues as a direct result of having faith in people, but it's also bad because this means that Paul has re-affirmed this belief in me enough times that coming from him the cancellation was not surprising.
So initially I wasn't mad. But then, as the conversation progressed, I got to thinking about it a little and decided that he'd better have a damned good reason for why he can't make it to my birthday party. Because, I mean, this is once a freakin' year. The one day that people, especially my friends, are supposed to go out of their way to make sure I'm, if not happy, at least not disappointed, right? Maybe I'm wrong. Anyway, he didn't tell me the reason, so I can't judge whether it's a good one or not. And I didn't probe, because, well, probing never got anyone anywhere. The aliens certainly didn't find anything they liked through probing judging from their abstaining attitude towards paying our planet any further visits, no?

My midterm, worth 37.5%, is tomorrow. I still have a full chapter to read and five lectures worth of notes to go over. I doubt I'm going to be acing it. But it's too freaking hot to read about mood disorders. It just makes me want to kill myself, and there's this entire bit about suicide in there... I don't think that'd be very uplifting, so I'm ignoring it until I give in to my repressed anxiety, currently expressing itself in the incessent tapping of my foot and gritting of my teeth.

I went shopping this weekend, splurged buying all sorts of stuff and making appointments to spend money in the future - which means that I now owe myself something like $260. I think a big problem with my saving tactics is that I know, deep down, that I'm not actually going to go to Cuba with Nelly next year no matter how much money we save because something will inevitably come up. This 'knowledge' sets me up and gives me an excuse to touch money I know I shouldn't be touching. I suck. I have no self-control.

On this "Depression Assessment Checklist" thing we did in class, the prof made us pretend we're depressed and write a broad "I" statement about ourselves without using the word "am". It was supposed to be an exercise that made you pinpoint specific things you don't like about yourself instead of saying general things like "I am lazy" or "I am stupid" that just make you even more depressed and aren't constructive, ya dig? Its apparently used in treatment for depression, but I think depressed people could find a way to circumvent it if they really wanted, as I shall illustrate later. Anyway, my friend wrote "I don't like it when I overreact in certain situations involving my boyfriend." My neighbour wrote, "I don't use my time effectively on weekends."

I wrote "I suck."
I think I found a way to wreck her "I" without "am" exercise. And I'm not even clinically depressed. Stupid her.

God. Idiot. (ala Napoleon Dynamite)

I gained two pounds back. Go fatty go.
The end.

Trichotillomania

I lost four pounds in a little over a week.
I'm not sure how.
Maybe I have depression? Depression is characterized by a persistent, uncontrollable feeling of hopelessness, and occasionally marked by weightloss and an inability to get out of bed.
I suffer from all of the above. But I also have delusional thinking sometimes, and that's not part of the Depression diagnosis, so maybe I have some new sort of disorder they haven't classified yet in the DSM?
I'm not a hypochondriac, I know that, because I'm not afraid of minor symptoms being indicative of a serious life-threatening disease such as heart attack or cancer. Although Depression is pretty life-threatening since a whole lotta people who have it end up committing suicide (something like 15%?)
I think I should just stop reading my Abnormal textbook.

Whole grain bread is actually really quite good. I never used to like it. In fact, I hated it. I only ever ate white bread. But since my dad decided to actually take care of himself, he's been buying nothing but the whole-grain stuff. And it totally grows on you. Now I don't think I would eat white bread if I had the choice. This whole-grain stuff has more flavour, more to look forward to with each bite - for example, the grains! Mm mm. Try it.
(This could be cognitive-dissonance reduction, so don't hold me to it.)

And I have a new food addiction. It used to be the KFC Twister - not that I ate it a lot. I've only ever had two in my lifetime, but I thought about it SO MUCH. Now it's Oatmeal to Go - Banana Bread. Man. I dream about the stuff. Seriously.
I'm obsessed with food.
There's nothing under "Eating Disorders" in the DSM for people who are obsessed with food in a positive way. Only the weirdos who starve themselves or engage in binging and purging. So I guess this isn't a disorder.

Did you know that there's a disorder called Trichotillomania and it's people who can't resist plucking their hair out, usually resulting in marked hair loss? WTF?

I don't think I'd make a very good clinical psychologist. I'm not very sympathetic towards weirdos like that.

wooga wooga

The Bet is now officially over. (I tried to include the link and failed, whatever, you all know what I'm talking about anyway...)
Both Nelly and I completely and utterly lost. Which is good because I couldn't afford to pay out $100 at this time as I owe myself $105.89 as it is.

It's lucky I don't charge myself interest...

I think Yang might be dead.
Anyone with knowledge of Yang's whereabouts (dead or alive) should yell it at me. (The knowledge.)

What else... Uh, that dude has been removed from my list of Noteworthy Blogs since he hasn't updated in a really long time. I don't even know what his name is anymore. Maybe I never knew it to begin with... Strange are the workings of time...

And... hmm... well nothing else worth noting actually happened today. Except that it is now official: I hate the morning Aerobics instructor. She's psycho.

I let it slip that Pauly is dating B* at Alex's party.
Uh... George went on a date.
Hmm... I still haven't called Zeebs back since I was supposed to yesterday...
Ggh... No sign of my G2 test in sight...
Nelly is making me my dress...
And, it's officially June. And time for me to study for my upcoming midterm.
Toodles.